Reading Between the Lines

"You don't like him",  she says in a disappointed and accusatory tone.
"I didn't say I don't like him, I just said that I don't know him", I defensively say.

It was refreshing, the feeling of being liked and not the other way around. Refreshing to be linked to another male other than the cliche' male you got linked to way back in high school who you will not be giving another chance by the way, but that's a different story. The feeling of your friends teasing you with him. It's just like high school, only you know how to play the game better.

Flattery escaped my thoughts as soon my cautious and over-thinking-up-to-the-point-paranoid self warned me against such emotions worried of the fact that I may get hurt. I listened to it. I have no qualms once that self starts talking because It has always worked that way. I have always played safe, barely taking risks and wouldn't break conventions.

Going back to the guy liking me, I never told him I liked him. Never responded to his hi's (actually it was more second hand hi's as he never did it personally)in an encouraging way. How can I? It wasn't that appealing. I hoped though, at the back of my head, that he'd do something - not something fancy or anything but something real, sincere and well-thought-of that I would appreciate. It never came.

In his defense, he might say, 'Why would I put effort on a girl whose feelings I am not aware of, why gamble? In fact, why would I put effort on her, when I'm sure she doesn't like me.'

In my defense I say this, 'I am torn. When I say, 'Oh he likes me', it is immediately followed by, 'Wait, how much?' So how do you pacify the doubt and retain the excitement? Feed the excitement, so it may flourish to reciprocity after flattery, and who knows it may blossom into something more.

For the guy, what have you got to lose? Besides, time, money (hopefully) and energy? Those things aren't so bad losing considering that she may be 'the one'. Think of it as an investment. While we are at it, when you claim to like someone, don't you think that it's a perfect opportunity to be creative? You may discover another side of you that is artistic in nature. It's an opportunity to use logic, instead of wasting time doing analysis and strategies in playing DOTA, why not channel that to a perfectly crafted plan in getting 'the one' complete with reinforcements and back-up plans.

For a little effort, a little push, a little exertion, over the yes of the one you like, don't you think it's worth doing? At least you know at the back of your head that you tried, that you were sincere, you were a man. Because if you were sweet and sincere during the chase, I would say yes.

Then again, I may not have been liked that much to begin with - The harsh truth.

A stance

I engaged my dad in a debate yesterday regarding the RH Bill and I was so frustrated with him cutting me in mid-sentences so after I had my last say, I tapped the table separating us three times and loudly said, “Hay Nako!” at each tap.  

He said that my arguments are good and valid but I was not composed and if it were a competition I would lose to form over content.

It started with my question about liberalism and it led to a debate on the RH Bill.

At the time that I was a member of the debate society, I never encountered any motion regarding the RH Bill so I never really researched on the issue until, I became an Intern at the World Youth Alliance, Asia Pacific.

I wrote a paper regarding my stance months ago and it is still my stance.

(February 19, 2012)

What is the RH Bill?

The House Bill No.  4244 or the Responsible Parenthood, Reproductive Health and Population Development Act of 2011 has been renamed seven times in the last 13 years that is has continuously being pushed for and ever being debated upon.

To many, the bill is pro-poor as is it aims to create programs for them such as health care. But what is mainly being opposed in the bill is the provision on the program on modern family planning where contraceptives are introduced. Another controversial provision of the Bill is the sex education which elementary students from grade 5 to 4^th year high school will be receiving.

The main point that the RH Bill is seeking to drive through is the connection of overpopulation to poverty. The Philippines with a population of more than 100 Billion is said to be overpopulated and many have linked this fact to the poverty in our country with which the RH Bill seeks to resolve.

What is my stand on the proposed Bill?

Common sense. That is what everybody is saying when wanting to point out why the RH Bill is good for our country. “Common sense” say the authors of the Bill saying that a household should rightfully be given an informed choice especially if they know that they cannot anymore support an addition to a family of eight.  They say that access to contraceptives should be given to the poor as they are the ones who bear more than they can support – this is the battle cry of the bill.

On the issue of morality, the church is being attacked due to their opposition to the Bill with people even saying that the Church loves the poor because they are the primary financers of the Church and up to now still teaches, “grow and multiply”. It is even being substantiated by people saying that the poorest countries are those that are predominantly Catholic.

Rebutting people who are pro RH Bill who are saying that there is a link between overpopulation and poverty, I say that in the Philippines, we are not overpopulated but there is an overcrowding especially in the NCR region. The tendency of the people in provinces is to migrate to Manila in the hopes of better opportunities for them but because jobs are limited here, they end up not having jobs at all resulting to the rise of depressed areas. The government therefore should be creating a way for more job opportunities not only in the Manila area but in the provinces as well by allowing for investors may they be local or foreign to invest in the Philippines for the creation of jobs. If there are more job opportunities in the many regions of the Philippines, poverty will be eradicated.

In connection to people having job opportunities and poverty being eradicated, households now will be able to send their children to school as they have the money to support them and therefore an increase in the literacy rate of the Philippines. More people being educated means more people being given the chance to a brighter future. Because people are now educated they will become more informed and will plan, based on their education, the guidance from their parents and their religious beliefs how they will create a family of their own. Because people are empowered, not only will their actions be justified by their stand but they will indirectly contribute to growth of the economy without the implementation of the RH Bill.

On the issue on morality, I agree that the government and the church are separate institutions and the separation of the church and the state shall be inviolable with respect to the other religions practiced in the Philippines. The church may be stating their opposition to the Bill and it may matter to Catholics and it may not matter to non-Catholics but precisely the fact that we are coming from different religious backgrounds, an imposition such as the RH Bill should not be made into law because the government has no right to tell a person, a family or a sector of how they should run their families.

Beyond the faulty reasoning of those pro RH Bill, what are the values that they are promoting? Their disregard for the value of human life is the implication. Human life is important not because human life is equal to an economic entity but because humans are free, thinking beings with human dignity that should be respected and given due rights based on a clear understanding of human dignity.

The wrong values that the RH Bill promotes may hypothetically solve the problem of overpopulation but it may not necessarily eradicate poverty. It may teach people to bear a number which they can support but the degradation of the value of life will be evident as human beings are seen as a liability and not as a blessing. Education and empowerment of people should already be enough for the development and progress of a country and is set on targeting the core problem of our society and not just imposing a temporary solution that is bound to fail to a deep-seated problem.